What’s up with 2011? Or the key to happiness. March 15, 2011
Posted by armina in dareberry, friends related, thoughts.add a comment
I haven’t been posting here for a very long time. I thought of leaving it as it is forever. Then today, being an unusual day I have decided to tell about it and…about my plans for this year…just felt like sharing.
So today I woke up at 13.00 and worked a bit, went to sleep at 17.00 because i refused to drink a coffee instead 
and I slept one hour, then from 18.00 I worked until 21.00 and then went to sleep and woke up at 22.00 and have been chillaxing since then. Weirdest day…
I have had full weekends and some full weeks, too – full of work, full of fun…this year started at a very high speed and it’s been said to continue like that. I am loving it and I am glad I know my body and will feel when I need to stop in advance so I won’t break…something I see happening around quite often 
This is it for me…this is the year when “i make it or break it” – what does this mean? Well…I have been dreaming unintentionally, every other fortnight, for 3 years (since I came back to Romania) that I am in a foreign country, having the lifestyle I wish for. D. feels the same, so we decided that in 2011 we either get to live as we want in Romania or we leave. I am glad to say that though it’s just March, we have been progressing towards the lifestyle we want.
The funny thing is that we don’t need “stuff” to get to the lifestyle we want but we need people and feelings – we want to feel relaxed as the Italians are feeling, we want the sun they have, we want to see less randomness around us and in people’s minds, similar to Swiss thinking style, we want to mix work and fun as much as possible so that the “criticism and crisis-sadness, typical Romanian complaining-chatter” doesn’t get to us.
We realized that if we want to make things work with us and around us we need a reinforcement for our beliefs for the better and this can be easily done if we go for a trip outside the country for a few weeks. Unfortunately sometimes a few weeks is too much when you have things to do so we need to find “alternative ways of energy” – something to keep us running and that helps us stay healthy – like not get the “complaining-crisis-sadness-criticism-attitude” which gets us to think that nothing can be done and then we are back down.
And…I rediscovered some old ways of recharging my batteries (like chatting with really old friends whom I haven’t seen in a long time and dancing on some trance) and I found new alternative ways of getting energy: planning new projects, being in front of a bunch of people telling stories, delivering trainings, and…I tend to believe another one for me is driving – but first I have to learn some more mechanics, pass the darn exam, and get the license – and then I will be driving a lot
I love it that I am charging my batteries more often from the trainings and talks I have with people and in the same time I am contributing to their personal development. In the same time there have been many 16 hours days of work…and…I love that, too.
Then again like in every spring, I needed a reassurance and I got it: from time to time I am wondering how much am I worth it on the market, being afraid that perhaps my company is not the best option for me – well…on the market I worth so so so much less than in my company and here I definitely love what I do and I love it that I have time for volunteering as well. And from what I have heard this is valid for my price on the Western Europe market, too.
So work hard, play hard! Don’t forget the money you make is not worth the work unless you spend it on something that makes you happy…ideally something for you…ideally not “a thing”, but a memorable experience!
The more memorable experiences you create for yourself and for the others, the happier you will be – that’s the key to happiness.
Nicknames May 17, 2010
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This post is about nicknames and how annoying I find them sometimes.
Today I got a link to a blog from a friend. I liked the blog a lot and I found the blogger to be a very interesting individual. He is an erudite I would love to learn a thing or two from, but he is nowhere to be found. It’s just his nickname and his blog. And while I was reading the “About” page which was talking about the “nickname” and not saying much about the guy himself I remembered my acting teacher from high school. I admired him a lot – a complex person, dressing in simple clothes, always smoking elegantly (this made him look a bit mysterious) and asking questions I have never thought about. One of the questions that got stuck in my mind forever was: “Aren’t you proud of your name?”. He asked me this question at my first acting course, when I didn’t even know if I was in, because they were selecting very few people and I badly wanted to be among the selected ones, but I had no clue what they expected from me. The first thing they asked us was to present ourselves. To pronounce our names as in “My name is…” and then to sing our names. It seemed dumb to many of us, like…they already knew our names from the moment our parents subscribed us there…Anyways, one by one we told our names. Since to me at that moment it seemed unimportant and I was a very shy compared to nowadays, I told them my name as if I would have sad a bad joke and I knew it was a bad joke: in a low voice, without any pride, almost inaudible. Aaaand yes, I saw my teacher’s face saddening. And then he explained it all to us: you might like or dislike the name your parents gave you but you should learn to cherish it. After all, it’s the it that defines the who. It’s not a tag as many call it, is so much more. Is the “how they call you” when they think about your actions, when they love you, when they hate you, it’s even how you call yourself when you look in the mirror or try to encourage yourself to become a go getter! It’s part of you and when someone asks you what’s your name you should pronounce it loud and clear, and if the context allows it, you should also add a look straight in the eye of the questioner and a firm handshake. Of course if all this represents you and defines who you are. If not, you can stay little and hide behind a nickname, even if you are grand. You can make the nickname the gatekeeper to the real you, so that the curiosity and love of others will not reach your heart…if that’s who you want to be. But if you believe that most of the people on this globe are good people and don’t mean you harm, like I do, then you don’t need a gatekeeper to your heart.
Sipping a coffee in Genoa… July 29, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry, thoughts.Tags: freedom, gelato, Genoa, holidays, relaxation, Romania, the sea
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It’s been a long time since I wrote last time. I have been going through a period where many thoughts were diving through my mind. After a lot of hard work this spring, we decided to take a 1-2 months break. We bought a one way ticket to Milan and from there we went to Genoa – a place where we have lived before and we fell in love with. We have been here for 16 days now and we love it. It’s no wonder people here live up to 100 years old. We have already done the Cinque Terre track 4 or 5 times and seen the French Riviera about 4 times, together with Santa Margherita Ligure and Portofino…
I just can’t get enough of the typical icecream…the best I have ever tasted. I would fly to here once a year just for the gelato from Boccadasse. It is faithfull love – i don’t really eat other icecreams even though I am in love with it – because nothing compares with it. Sometimes I cheat and buy a Hagen Daz where it is available…as a surogate cause nothing compares with the Boccadasse icecream from Latteria Antica.
I love watching people on fitness bikes on a terasse on the rocks in front of the sea. The trainer plays this wonderful music that makes you paddle some more and gain speed and you are biking and biking and watching the sea…that’s sports!
For me, there is nothing more beautiful than a rocky edge you look over and see the sea…and possibly there will be people sunbathing on the rocks, just like seals do….Mountains and the Sea! Both in the same 50sq meters!
Amazingly enough the business goes just fine with me and Daniel in a holiday. I don’t know whether we are great managers or it’s just some luck, but it works. We can actually be in a holiday for half a month and the “machine” keeps running just as well.
Also amazing is the fact that my Italian has never been better. It seems it improved more from making translations than from actually living here. I have been living here for 1-6 months a year since 2006 and I gained another language skill without even opening a book…I even make money from translations…why go to Harvard? If you have a brilliant mind and want to keep it that way, don’t choose education means and institutions that will make you lose the ability of your artistic and dreamy side of your brain! At least this is how I see things. To evolve, we need to use more of our brain, more of our both sides of our brain…which we thought is not quite identical with becoming a senior business analyst in my case or a senior system engineer in Daniel’s case.
We have no plans for tomorrow and this gives my mind so much freedom and imagination started running loose again. The best thing to do if you want new ideas is to “disconnect” and travel. I have a great business idea. I am sure others have thought about it but well, many have thought about outsourcing, too, but few do it properly. So I am sure that in time, with work and patience I could put this idea into practice and it doesn’t matter how many competitors are there, I know I can do it better and if Daniel helps and Luxi also, we could all have the best “special” travel agency – of course it will be special…what did you think? that we will have “just another travel agency”?…We have always loved the travel industry so this might be the place to actually be since we weren’t quite happy as “multinatinals’ employees with pretty good salaries”.
There was a month when we thought the dream of owning a studio could become reality since prices were going down in Romania. Now they ar up again…and most of our friends say “take a loan and buy the damn studio”…well for us being in dept means loosing our freedom, which is priceless!
From here, on the 4th of August we will fly to Brussels – going from an old town to a more 21st century-like city. We were invited there by our dear friends and we will stay for an undefinite time. We still have the rented flat in Romania but don’t feel like running back there. We are quite disapointed of the guys who run the country and the mentality of the people. Last autumn we were so anxious to go back and thought that so many things would have changed to the better…we were so wrong. The clowns who have the power are the same, just where different make-up depending on the party they left and the party they joined and things aren’t any better. To live there and not be affected by what happens around you, you either need a crazy dosage of optimism and struggle everyday to do things better and motivate others to do so, too (like Musat for example), or you need to be totally senseless…which is hard because we are “souls” people…we went back for our families and friends…to be closer to them and hoped that living there might be better. Instead, to make sure I won’t become a “anger monster”, I had to think of some mind tricks: I almost never watched the news, I visited my parents and went out with my friends as much as possible. I watched only Discovery and Travel & Living became the “most watched” TV channel in the house. Once in a while I asked my mother to tell me the news…she got used to watching them everyday as it it was a soap opera and in the same time to be detached. She also puts some humor in the story so it works for me.
Adina came back to Pitesti last month. After living in the Western Europe for about 4-5 years she thought of coming back and starting a business with her husband. They were sooo optimistic and full of energy. They reminded us of ourselves last autumn and we thought we got to get them back to their senses because this “folie” will only make them invest in things that will eat money and soon they will be just as dissappointed as us. Now they are back in Brussels and think about their “folie” more realistically. Just like us, they were puting their hopes into “living in Romania”…might not be the best idea ever…
Thank God for cheap flights…not that I believe in God…but it’s a good way to express the fact that cheap flights are great and help feed our freedom thirst.
More with the next coffee…maybe…
Whatever helps you sleep at night… March 30, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry.Tags: crisis, happyness, life, living, millionaire, slamdog, sleep
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YEverybody is talking about this crisis…well my darlings it will not stop if you keep talking about it. It will not stop if you are trying to change things either because “up there”, there people that are more powerful then you and this is one of the species of “war” in the 21st century.
As my mom says: “The crisis is a crisis for those who had tons of money and now they have just a portion, but for us, the ones that are as poor as 20 years ago, and who’s jobs were always under a question mark, there is no crisis, is just how things are and have always been!”
I was among those that had lost a job because of the crisis and i am far better now. Why? Because i didn’t concentrate on that. I erased any connection with the moments of sadness the “crisis” provoked in me and went for entrepreneurship which in my view, is means freedom. It is true that not everybody can do this but reading, seeing, talking and complaining about the crisis won’t bring anything good in your life.
Try to watch some movies like “slamdog millionaire” or “Australia” and you will see there are and were worst times then these ones we are living in! They are not “just” movies…they are the representation of how much a person can bare and what you should concentrate on in life.
A friend of mine who is very dear to me, sent me this video: “Everything is amazing, nobody’s happy” . Watch it and you will realize in what wonderful world we are living in!
My dareberry for today is: “Whatever helps you sleep at night” – which is my advice for you to try to concentrate on the beautiful and positive aspects of life. As long as you are not dead, you should enjoy living and concentrate on whatever helps you sleep at night!
Where’s the real music? March 19, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry.Tags: hip hop, Lady Gaga, music, no.1 song, top songs
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Because I am growing tired of hearing Lady Gaga everywhere…I mean, come on, we have been hearing it on the radio since how long ago?…I decided to check out the billboard to see what’s new…
Well…I am sad. Top 10 it’s all rap/hip hop (which from my point of view most of it is “manele americane”…very few ones create quality hip hop) and a few white little ladies who “blues”/complain about something – except Lady Gaga, who occupies 2 spots who is great but come on, i like diversity. So I was just wondering…all these guys, except the “featuring Timberlake” are what…like 18-20? Where are the older guys? Are they all in rehab? I miss the real music.
When I was just thinking that way, one of my best friends tagged me in a note about a great place. At this is going to be my dareberry of the day. On this website you can see the #1 song anytime in history. It’s like a journal of the great songs when also people above 25 were singing and were making history not just money. Here it is: Josh Holser’s website.
Enjoy!
My 4 days factory adventure January 29, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry.Tags: amazing people, factory, outside the confort zone, simplicity
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A few weeks ago a friend of mine asked me if I could help her. She owns a translation agency and she needed a German-Romanian interpreter for a technical training. She didn’t know too many details, and I didn’t ask too many questions. I just said YES.
I liked the idea of a new experience and it was not a 100% unknown field, since i have done training interpretation many times before. So i just went for it:)
The short story is this: for 4 days i was interpreting a training about a precision welding machine. The high-tech of that machine fascinated me and the cold, the smell, the noise and the oily atmosphere from the production platform drove me crazy. I can say that now I know a lot about the latest technology in precision welding. I even know how to use that machine. I stood up and walked around the machine for 9 hours per day, dressed-up as if I was going on a mountain trip (and I still caught a cold).
The long story is this: I got to meet really nice people that were not very educated but had so much good-sense that not even a Ph. D. could overpass them. These guys were amazing – all they wanted to know was what they should do to do their job best. They were the most proactive participants i have ever seen in a training i have been in. They asked all the possible questions, trying to get as much know-how as possible in the flat price the training was delivered for. They were also very stubborn. They knew some English and insisted in making themselves understood instead of waiting for me to translate. The trainer was a really cool guy who happened to be from Frankfurt am Main – a town with tons of memories for me – so we went for a drink afterwords and exchanged some opinions about cars, cheese and the Romanian culture. I also learned a lot of technical terms (industry related) in German. The last day was the most amazing though: I woke up as usually and felt sick. I almost felt like not going but I thought I would push my limits. Again, the cold, the noise, the machine and its functions, and in the end i came back to town by bus not by train. I set by a very interesting lady. She was so simple and so amazingly interesting. She was working for that company since she finished high school and she had 3 kids one more wonderful than the other, and she kept talking about school, about the old times, about all sorts of things, and i kept listening. The trip is about 30 minutes. We got to town and we said good-bye, no names exchanged or anything…as if i was working in the factory since forever and we were going to see each other in the same bus again. This reminded me of my mother’s youth – she also used to work in a factory for about 20 years until she got sick and she retired. I almost felt like i lived a day of her life from about 10 years ago.
All in all it was amazing to connect with these simple people for whom family is so important, doing a good job is all that counts when at work, no matter the salary or the working conditions, and that huge “amount” of good-sense…
So, yes, i got a cold and a strange dizziness but it was a great experience.
My dareberry for today is: no matter how many years of school you have, or how many countries you have seen, or how much money you make or spend per month, try to meet simple people and let yourself charmed by them. They are not hard to find and listening to them is always a win-win.
Vegetation is good January 19, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry.Tags: positiveenergy, vegetation
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Remember when in high school we were learning about beans’ growing? At biology, they would ask us to put a bean on a water soaked cotton piece and place it somewhere warm. After some days of waiting we would see an embryo. Those days of waiting were called vegetation.
In Romanian “vegetation” has a bad connotation – the same as “to be a parasite”, “to loose time” etc. Therefore…not useful.
But I am going to contradict the public opinion in this post. Actually this is my dareberry for today – “Vegetate and grow an embryo!”
The thing with vegetation is that the environment has to be suitable for that bean to grow an embryo at the end of that number of days. There are also beans that never grow an embryo, even with a suitable environment.
What I did, was to take 3 days away, put myself in a “boring” environment, where friends were only in the address book of my mobile, and they were staying there, get myself on a “no-news diet”, have the meals of my dreams (in my case low-fat, no pork kind of thing), find a familiar and comfy room and just lay there. I watched some movies, played some computer games, read something…in one word: “vegetation”.
Now vegetation is over and when I woke up today I felt different. It is also the subconscious “Monday, a good day for big things”, but sometimes this wasn’t enough. I grew a small plant:). I am full of energy and working enthusiastically on several projects thanks to the vegetation period. It helps clean your mind. Not, clear your mind, but literally clean your mind.
…or you might hate it so much that as Bomberman says “You can go outside and play now”, you will run away from anything like vegetation and do the extreme opposite, which is also great:).
Let’s get lost together January 16, 2009
Posted by armina in dareberry, thoughts.Tags: a kid's life, imagination gardener, life mission, thoughts
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A while ago i finished reading Brida by Coelho. I am not going to praise him – his writing style has good parts and bad parts…whatever. I liked the book a lot. Since then i am sort of under anesthesia. I regained a world i thought i lost – being able to write fantasy stories.
When i was in high school, i used to dream stories and the very next morning i would write them…it felt great and i felt special. not proud or arrogant, just glad i could write nice stories. In university my world crashed for a while (because of a guy) and i couldn’t write anymore (i couldn’t even smile for quite some time)…
It all started in secondary school…I had a literature teacher that made us learn by heart all commentaries for the books we should have read. I tried once to write my own opinion and she hated it so afterwords i just learned whatever she dictated. but no matter how much i would have learned she wouldn’t give more than 7 (out of 10). i disliked her but i tried to do my best in finding explanations for her behavior, finding excuses. In the end i just decided she was almost bald because of how mean she was.
When i got to high school, the first lesson with my literature teacher gave me the impression that this one was awful, too. And the hilarious part in this whole thing, is the fact that i probably have been reading more than all my colleagues together.
So my first moment of rebellion came. I used to be the kind of kid that is too serious for her age, that did all the homework and frightened guys who might have cared for her (i guess i still somehow intimidate guys). I decided that i will not make my homework and piss of the literature teacher. Nobody knew me, so why the hell not…so she asked me, and i stood up and told her i didn’t do my homework. She was pissed off but somehow she liked me. And this is how i started writing and discovered i was talented (at least back then…i have probably lost half of the skills i had…). She insisted that we don’t copy, learn by heart or sometimes even read other people’s commentaries until we have written down our own opinion about a book. So i did it…i started writing my own opinion about the books i read and…it seemed i got talent…
Then came university…i was craving to go for theater acting but did the rational thing…computer science because i didn’t have the guts to believe they could choose me in for a 18 students-class. It was not only the rational thing to go for computer science but also a responsible thing…i would have definitely been able to support myself after graduating. and it also had to do with a softer side…when i was a child i wanted to work for Disney to create those beautiful stories and the pretty animations. i thought computer science should have been the first step. how wrong…
Now is over…graduated 3 years ago. in the meantime i started and almost finished a masters, too. i don’t regret these choices. but i wonder what would have happened if i would have chosen, not computer science, not acting, but literature.
A few days ago i had a dream. It was amazing! i was in this unknown world, it seemed like i was in Zurich, but soo different. there were pretty women on the streets. i was with a guy who’s face i don’t remember, it was a guy i don’t know in the real life. we were walking on the street and more and more women, dressed like in the Indian traditional sari were coming from different directions hurrying in the same direction. We decided to follow them and find out what was happening, where were they going? so we go after them, and we end up at the lake. there were a bunch of colored guys there, dressed in African colorful costumes and dancing in a line near the lake. Most of the women were on the lake-side and one of them was throwing roses in the water. there were 3 ladies in the water…it seemed summer but it looked like they were freezing. one of them went down into the water to bring the drowning roses to the surface. the other two were helping her to catch her breath from time to time. we figured it out that the one that was saving the red roses from drowning, was the bride. there was no groom though…she had to save 3 roses and the damn roses couldn’t flout, and it was getting harder and harder to catch her breath between saving the roses. they were all happy and colorful and it was a majestic happening.
I should have been a literature teacher…though teacher is not the word i am looking for…i should have been the kind of dareberry that shows kids how to be creative, open-minded and unlimited…and still, i would love to be an “imagination gardener”…
are you lost with me yet?…i said “imagination gardener”:)
I used to rule the world November 24, 2008
Posted by armina in dareberry.Tags: coldplay, living life, masmerizing song, viva la vida
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The dareberry of the day is a song – you might have recognized one of the lines of this song in the title of this post.
Today i will do something i have never done before, i am going to dedicate this dareberry to someone. Mihail, this dareberry is for you:)
It’s a song i love and have been listening to it over and over again for weeks. I am masmarized!
There are so many meanings behind the lines of this song and though it speaks about falls and deceptions the orchestration feels so positive. I am talking about “Viva la Vida” by Coldplay.
Some say it is the story of the a painter who went through many tough things and once she painted a wall in her house and the painting was called “Viva la vida”, other say is about Louis XVI and the French revolution, which is also on the cover of Coldplay’s album, others say is about the fall of Napoleon, others say it’s about Bush, some others say it speaks about the fall of Christianity and how catholicism is not so appreciated as it used to be. Whatever the case, the lines are so full of meanings and for each person, each line might mean something else.
Even though i know quite some stuff about the French revolution and the history of Europe, and read a lot about religions, not so much about politics, for me this song has a special meaning, a particular one, that is valid only for me, and this is why i love this song so much.
Today’s dareberry is – listen to Viva la vida by Coldplay and figure out its meaning for yourself:)
The song:here
The lyrics:here
Opinions on the meanings: here
Viva la vida!
The “Burn out” or small batteries need to be recharged often November 13, 2008
Posted by armina in dareberry, thoughts.Tags: burn out, low batteries, low energy, mini-retirement
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that’s the dareberry of the day:)
it took me almost 3 weeks from the moment i thought “i need a break” until i actually decided and took action to take this break – i booked 5 days in Prague.
during these last 3 weeks my energy went so low that i got back pains, stomach problems, extremely low productivity (about 35% of the usual) and i started to loose patience with people and i needed much more time to process information and take decisions…all are symptoms of the “burn out disease”
during the last few years i realized that to function well, to have a healthy creativity and to be productive, i need 3-4 days off (maximum 5 days, otherwise it gets boring), away from everything (including Internet access), each 2.5-3 months. A client of mine calls these “mini-retirements”.
my advice for you and the dareberry of the day is this: find out your limit. how long do your batteries last and how long do they need to get recharged again? and …when you know the answer to this question, write it down someplace visible, so you will be able to SEE IT when your batteries are so low that you don’t even realize they are that low… when you get “burn out” you won’t be aware of it!
(it took me almost 3 weeks to realize what’s going on with me)
More on “Burn out” here.
hugs,
A.
